Posterous dies on 4/30/2013 so I've moved all my content and switched to Blogger.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

It's Daylight Savings Beeee-Otch! Change Your Leakfrog Batteries


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From woot.com today:

Shakedown Behind Toilet Avenue

“You must be mistaken, Officer. I don’t hear any dripping.” Her voice was like warm water. It set off my detector right away.

Two AM. A quiet night. Me and my partner were talking about the World Series. He said it was a fix, I said otherwise. You get right down to it, neither of us really cared. We were just killing time. Hoping nothing happened until morning. After a while we got quiet. My partner cleared his throat. I was gonna suggest coffee until- there it was. The feeling.

Maybe it’s not something you can explain to a regular guy. But after you’ve been a LeakFrog long enough, it’s like there’s some kinda detector inside of you, just waiting to go off. Maybe it wasn’t a big one yet, but it was a leak, a leak for sure. I took a glance at my partner. He’d been the other half of my two pack for a year now and he gave me the nod. He felt it. Somewhere, somewhere close by, there was a leak. And if we didn’t move in, it could grow bigger. There could be costly property damage or mold. I flipped on the siren. He grabbed three standard-issue AAA batteries. They were included. For each of us.

We found the house in no time. It was a nice place. Old, but in a good way. I thought it was full of class. My partner said it made him think of The Munsters. I told him to shut it but I didn’t mind. That was just his way. Always smiling. Me, I smiled too, smiled real good. But after a while people noticed my smile was painted on. Noticed that maybe my smile was just something I did to keep the world away.

It was my first night, at a house just like this. I saw some pretty blonde at the door. Felt my heart race. Let her talk me out of reporting the 1/32 of an inch of water I knew was there. 1/32 of an inch, I said to myself. What harm could come from 1/32 of an inch? But that night, I had a dream. And in the dream, I saw Frederick Barbarossa standing at a river in full armor. A 1/32 inch river. And then, he fell face down. And that was the end of Frederick Barbarossa. And that was the end of my dream.

Since then, I don’t sleep so much. And I never once have let a leak go uncommented on. A LeakFrog like me has to be the line between “dry” and “wet.” If I don’t stand up and say “No more!” then who will? Who will?

My partner rang the bell. When she opened the door I knew her right away. The woman, the one from all those years ago. I could see in her eyes that she didn’t know who I was. But I’d never forget her face.

“Oh, it’s just a little water,” she cooed. “Can’t we work this out?” My partner was buying it. I could see him thinking it over. I couldn’t really blame him, once I’d done the same thing. But not now. Now I had experience. Now I knew that being a LeakFrog was an honor… and a sacred trust.

“Forget it, lady!” I yelled. “You’re going up the river! And then I’ll keep yelling until that river’s cleaned up! For good! Call it in, partner!”

My partner nodded and set off our alarm. I looked back at the woman. Her eyes were like a flowing river, she wanted to carve me open like the Grand Canyon. “Don’t you know, ma’am?” I said as I took out the cuffs. “You can’t get anything past me and my partner. We’re a two pack of LeakFrogs. And you’re under arrest.”

My partner kept an eye on her until the towels arrived and the boys from downtown got to work. They said it was over now, and maybe it was. But I kept on pointing out that leak until every last drop was gone. I couldn’t stop whatever force made water so abundant in this world. But if it got loose, it wasn’t gonna go unnoticed. Not in my city. Not on my watch.

Two thirty-eight. A quiet night. Me and my partner drinking coffee. He’s got a grilled cheese. I got a turkey surprise. And the city’s floors are dry. Just like they should be. Just like they should be.

 

Warranty: 1 Year Ideative

Condition: New

Features:

  • LeakFrog is a water alarm that warns you of the first sign of a leak to prevent water and mold damage
  • Simply place LeakFrog in the areas where leaks or water over-flow might occur (hot water heaters, toilets, dishwashers, refrigerators, sinks, A/C drip pans, washing machines, bathtubs, wet bars, hot tubs, etc.)
  • When water starts to puddle, even if it’s only 1/32 inch of water, LeakFrog sets off its alarm to alert you
  • If no one is home, the alarm will continue to sound for hours (days with a fresh battery)
  • Works best on floors of wood, tile, metal or concrete
  • No installation is required
  • Requires (3) AAA batteries, included

In the box:

  • (2) Ideative LeakFrog Water Leak Alarms
  • (6) AAA Batteries
  • (2) Care and Use Instructions

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